Scarfie Fashionista

Here I am, soaking up the last ray of sunlight streaming through the common room window before the “insulation process” begins—a tiresome process that is initiated as soon as the sun drops behind the neighbour’s house. Once the natural/free heater has officially been blocked, someone gives the insulation shout, yelling in an extremely authoritarian voice something along the lines of “Let the insulation process begin!” and we quickly run to the perimeter of the room, shutting all of the curtains, and closing all doors and windows to keep whatever waning heat is left from the afternoon inside the flat. The curtains are meticulously pulled to a close, tucking and folding edges behind furniture and anything we can find, because if even one inch is left uncovered, we’re sure to be shivering later. We employ many heating tricks to save warmth and our pocket books for hot chocolate, but those techniques will have to wait for another time. I feel compelled to inform you of the fashion trends in New Zealand, in case you feel so inclined to come visit me soon, you’ll know how to fit in like a true Kiwi.

First, I think a little compare and contrast is necessary—you will have to employ your imagination for this exercise, so if you’re feeling a bit sleepy, skip to the next trend and then come back. I’m sure the shock will wake you up! There is a major “scarfie” trend here in Dunedin, and the surrounding New Zealand area. To clarify, “scarfie” is the name for students at the University of Otago. Because of the cold weather most students bundle themselves up in scarves daily and so came to be called “scarfies.”

Moving on, the scarfie trend in Dunedin is mono-coloured. That is, everyone pretty much thinks only one colour will suffice in their wardrobe, BLACK.

Now, let’s compare my average winter attire to theirs. Here is what I wear on pretty much a daily basis.

On the other hand, your average scarfie will wear (from top to bottom): black headband/hair tie, some sort of black/grey makeup, black shirt/dress, black puffer jacket, black scarf, black skirt, black leggings/tights, and black boots. I would have a picture for you, but the all black attire is semi-intimidating, and I am too afraid I would set off some Kiwi code taking pictures of random girls on the street. Despite the fact that their style goes pretty much completely against mine—since their outfits match and mine consist of throwing on every pretty colour I have in my closet—my flatmates have told me I’m quite easy to spot from far away. For now, I’ll take that as a compliment.

The second, and perhaps the smallest in physical dimensions, major trend I have noticed are...STUBBIES!

Stubbies—“Finally the Kiwi Male was able to liberate his thighs to a breathless country” (L&P)

So named due to their extremely short and small nature, Stubbies are all too popular here in Kiwi country. Nevermind the chilly winter weather, it is nearly impossible to go a whole day without spotting some meaty man thighs glowing from across the street, barely constrained by the shortest shorts I have seen away from a swimming pool in the US, and even then they are uncommon there. When I asked my orientation leader at my arrival about this trend (I noticed it on my first day, if that doesn’t prove their popularity I’m not sure what will) I was told that the shorter the shorts, the manlier the man... I hope to never meet an All Blacks player in a pair of Stubbies; it would be a frightening sight!

Because of the Stubbies ongoing popularity, L&P, a sprite-like pop (soda if you’re not in Minnesota, or fizzy if you’re a Kiwi) launched an ad campaign to solidify the ultra coolness of Stubbies. If you’re up for the gruesome-hillarious sight of some extremely short shorts and large hairy man legs, I’d suggest you check it out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSFCvG6curE Just don’t say I didn’t warn you!

So, if you're planning (which I'm sure you all are) to visit me soon, throw away all the colour in your suitcase, cut off the ends of your shorts and you'll fit right in. Otherwise, the Kiwi Kindness makes them most accepting here of other styles, so feel free to wear the rainbow and I'll be able to pick you out in a crowd in .01 seconds.

Cheers!